So I guess I’ve gotta say that the trios tournament was someone bittersweet for me, all things considered. Don’t get me wrong, I was legitimately happy to see Dave win, if nothing else it proved he still had it when people were questioning whether making a return a few months removed of his fortieth birthday was the right call, so to see him and his team claim the victory in the final, I have to admit that I marked out for him as a fan and a colleague. Plus, there was something enjoyable about the fact that at least it was won by a member of the Handsome Devils Club too, even if it wasn’t me. But losing sucks, bro. Even if it doesn’t dent my considerable ego or deter me from jumping back in the ring to carry on like it does for some, it does suck, and despite pride in our performance that night in Dallas, I still wish we’d gone a little further than we actually managed, you know? But that’s just how the cookie crumbled and Regan, Selena and Christy best us. Can’t argue with it, it happened, it was a fair fight and we lost. Not gonna see me spending much time moping over the loss, and by the end of the night, aches and pains be damned, I was cheering with the rest of the fans in the building that night as Dave finally picked up a pinball to bring the tournament to an end.
Was a shame to see it be Jordan that picked up the fall for her team, because unlike Bree who I tolerate for the sake of keeping the peace and Datura who I don’t really ‘get’ thanks to her weird obsession with my brother, I actually quite like Jordan. I’d gotten to know her through Jaina obviously and while I wasn’t exactly struck on who she called friend, I have to admit that she was a good kid and she was right for Jaina, which only added to my opinion. Got nothing against the Cruze kid really, but nothing seemed right about that relationship to me looking in from the outside, and while he didn’t want to hurt Jaina when they broke up, I can’t say I was that keen on the way things went down, you know? But I kept my mouth shut because I know when my opinion isn’t wanted… well, I always know when it isn’t wanted even if I don’t always keep it to myself, but that was one of the times when I actually kept my mouth shut and just made sure Jaina knew where I was if she needed anything. She hadn’t. And that was fine.
But Jordan, aside from questionable taste in the friendship department, she seemed like a cool chick. I’d heard through the grapevine about some of the good causes she’s used her money on, and more importantly Jaina seemed happy so I was too. That said, if given the choice, I’d have wanted Dave to drop her like a hot plate every single time. Family loyalty is one thing, but I’m a Helms not a Lancaster, so there was only one person I was cheering on that night. Just wish it was Bree or maybe Datura that got pinned instead, but it is what it is. In general though, as I made the trip back from Dallas after the show, despite the loss in round one and thinking about what a shame it was that Jordan was the one pinned, I actually felt pretty good about everything that happened the night before. It was fucking good to be back in the ring, I know that much; spending more than twelve months on the shelf had left me feeling pretty useless to be honest so to finally jump back in the ring as myself, it was kind of a landmark moment and I enjoyed it even if it was brief. Amy hadn’t had much time for me other than crawling into bed beside me in the hotel but all I wanted was to sleep and understandably Kelsai was her primary focus aside from choice of sleeping companion so I travelled alone on the flight back to Nola, with plans for us to meet up properly when we found the time. Everyone was busy, it was understandable, and I kind of think she was still a bit annoyed about the whole ‘Trenta’ thing too, not telling her about it, but my hands were tied on that one, which I’m sure she knew about. It was just an opportunity to bust my chops I guess.
I think we’d all expected that though, at least to some extent. It was Lucas I felt bad for; I’d not really taken much heat and Regan, while annoyed, was happy she at least got to travel with Dave again, but Trinity… bro, she was pissed. Half expected to have to offer him the keys to my place next to Dave’s in the hills at one point, to save him staying in a hotel, but eventually she let it go. 
I think she realised it was good seeing the fore lit under him again, which made up for the fact that he’d kept the whole thing from her to begin with. In the end, everything was good, though I’m not gonna lie, returning from Dallas made me question the accuracy of that assessment once I finally got back to the house where Aniya was waiting for me. “Tough break baby,” she told me as she hugged me once I walked through the door, her arms wrapped tightly around me. She hadn’t been travelling with me since my return, but that was supposed to be changing once we’d tied up a few loose ends that were keeping her busy, be it the club in Hollywood or her work with Amy’s charity. Kissing me on the cheek, Nia finally let me go and I grabbed my case to head upstairs. “The knee feeling okay? I’ve gotta say Jase, it looked like you haven’t missed a step, so that’s good, right?”
I nodded. “Knee feels great babe,” I told her as we headed upstairs. “Though it may be one of the few things that doesn’t ache right now. Nothing a massage won’t fix though,” I added with a grin. She gave me a look that told me I didn’t stand a chance.
“How’s Kelsai doing?” Nia asked me, shifting the conversation away from my dire need for her fingers to work their magic. “It looked like she took a real beating. Is she okay?”
“She was last I checked,” I said as we headed into our bedroom. “She’s a tough kid, she’ll be fine after a few days rest. I’m sure Victor will nurse her back to full health.”
“I hope so. I like her, she’s a nice person,” my wife told me as I put my case on the bed and unzipped it. My gear from the previous night was in a separate bag that would go straight to the cleaners, but everything else was a jumbled mess and I grinned sheepishly at Nia as she rolled her eyes.
“This is why we need to get you back on the road with me, so that you can keep me in line!” I protested and she suddenly looked troubled. That wasn’t a good sign.
“Yeah well, I actually wanted to talk to you about that…” she said, her voice trailing off, and I could hear she wasn’t sure about whatever she wanted to say.
“Sounds ominous,” i told her as I closed my case again and moved it from the bed. Unpacking could wait, this was clearly more important given how unsure she’d sounded.
“I dunno about ominous, but I’m not sure you’re gonna like it,” she told me, biting her lower lip nervously for a moment before pressing on. “While you were in Dallas, I did some thinking and I nearly text you this morning saying we needed to talk when you got home but that would have actually sounded ominous and I didn’t want to worry you for no reason, baby. But… well, after thinking about it, I’m not sure I should come back on the road with you…”
Well that came out of nowhere… talk about taken by surprise, I was shooketh! “What? Why?!”
“Because I’m just too busy, baby!” she explained, sounding both emphatic and stressed in equal measure. “I wish I had the time I really do, but between the Dahlia and helping Amy with various things for New Horizon I just don’t have the free time I did before you got hurt! And as much as I’d love to just drop everything and hit the road with you Jase, we both know that the other stuff I do is important…”
“Gee, thanks,” I said, though I wasn’t actually hurt by the remark. Our bar, The Black Dahlia, was important obviously, it was the other source of income in our little miniature empire and Nia’s baby too, so it was obvious why she wanted to dedicate more time to it. As for New Horizon, do I even need to go into why her work there mattered?
“Babe, come on, you know I think your career is important too,” she said softly, as if she was trying to butter me up. Evidently she hadn’t picked up on the fact that I was only joking. “But what can I do to help with that, given I’m not a wrestler, or a fighter at all come to think of it. I’m more of a distraction than a help, we both know that! Plus the Dahlia… the… oh fuck you!” she trailed off, spotting the smirk on my face and finally realising I wasn’t actually upset. I mean, maybe ‘upset’ isn’t the right word because I was looking forward to having her back on the road with me again but I wasn’t annoyed that she wanted to take a step back. Her justification was flawless, it made sense. “You had me feeling like such a bitch just now, you jerk!” she said before shooting me a crooked smile. She knows I love that smile…
I returned it with interest. “Just… can I ask you something?” I asked, wanting to be sure about one thing before I let her off the hook completely. She nodded her head without saying anything so I just came out with the only reservation I had about the whole thing. “Well, I just wanna make sure it is about the Dahlia and New Horizon, I guess? It’s not that Amy is on the road or that you’re annoyed I didn’t tell you about the Lucho Brothers stuff or something else like that… right?”
She gave me a funny look and then realised I was being serious. She pushed me down on the bed and settled in next to me, laying her head on my chest. “Babe, how long have we had our arrangement now, huh? We both know how things work, and I’ve never had a problem with you wanting to share a room with Amy when you’re on the road, even if I was with you. I just got to go out and enjoy myself too,” she told me, circling a finger on my stomach over the top of my t-shirt. “As for the coffee guys stuff, I wasn’t even remotely angry. I get why Regan, Trinity, even Amy were… but your career has always been your business and I was just happy to see you back. You didn’t have to keep it from me, but I don’t care that you did. You know that.”
I did. I do. But I had to check, just to be sure. “Alright,” I said, trying to resist closing my eyes. Our bed really was way too fucking comfortable. “I had to check though. I understand you wanting to spend your time on something you can actually sink your teeth into, but I don’t want you just saying you want to step back because you feel uncomfortable about something or angry or whatever, you know?”
Nia shifted her weight so she was more on her front and looked up at me. “Jase, when have I ever not made it abundantly obvious if I was angry with you, huh?” she asked me with a smirk playing across her features. “As for you wondering if I’m jealous of you spending time with Amy on the road, don’t be ridiculous. If I was jealous about anything, don’t you think it would have shown up way before now? Besides, it’s me who has the ring on her finger, not Amy…”
“I mean, technically Amy has one too,” I pointed out, half expected to get hit for being so pedantic.
“Yes, smart ass, but it’s from Wyatt, not you!” Nia replied, laughing. Thank christ for that. I legit didn’t want to get hit, I still ached way too much!
“Alright, alright, point taken,” I said, chuckling. “Well, I won’t say I’m not sad that you’re not gonna be travelling with me anymore babe, but I do understand why you want to stop. And it’s not like you came to every show anyway, is it? Plus I’ve got Dave and Lucas around now, and Amy is there too.”
“You could ask her if she wants to walk out to the ring with you for your matches?” She suggested, and I thought about it for a moment before shaking my head.
“Nah, I’m not gonna do that,” I told her. “Amy is busy helping Kelsai, giving her advice and trying to help her achieve her goals. The last thing I wanna do is detract from that, force her to split her time between the two of us. Besides, if Amy was at ringside with me and something happened backstage to Kelsai because Amy wasn’t around, I’d never hear the end of it, would I?” I pointed out, and this time Aniya did hit me, a playful punch in the arm and a scolding look.
“You know Jason Helms, with two strong minded women in your life, I have no idea how you make it through the week without getting your ass kicked,” She said, laughing at me as I tried to look as innocent as possible. “Besides, me not going back on the road has other benefits too, doesn’t it?” she asked.
I tried to figure out what those benefits were, but all I could come up with was that it meant she could go out and have her fun whenever she wanted while I was away with work, but I didn’t think it was that. I mean, she could do that while on the road too. “Alright, I give in… what other benefits?”
“Isn’t it obvious?” she asked, tilting her head to one side. “It would mean we could start thinking about the next step... about maybe having a baby?” she said and I sat up straight, sending her rolling to her side as I backed away, glaring at her.
“Woah, woah, woah, woah, woah!” I said, not sure where the fuck that had come from. “That… you… we… what?!”
I must have looked pretty funny, or weirded out or something, because she started laughing at me. Was it some sort of joke? Was she just trying to get a rise out of me? Because if that’s what it was, no offence babe, but I prefer a different kind of rise if you catch my drift! “You should see your face right now,” she said, laughing again. “I wish I had my phone handy, I’d send a picture to everyone showing them how frightened you look!”
“So what, you’re joking?” I asked but she shook her head.
“No, I wasn’t joking when I said it,” Nia told me, rolling her eyes. “But that doesn’t make it any less funny looking at the way you’ve flipped out over it. Seriously though baby, we’re not getting any younger, are we? And we’ve been married long enough that I think people are already wondering when it’s gonna happen, even if I can’t help shaking the idea that I already live with a big baby by living with you, let alone introducing a newborn to the house… but I think we’re ready, and me coming off the tour schedule officially means that we can maybe start trying…”
Not gonna lie bro, I was starting to sweat already. I mean, it’s not that I don’t want kids or that I don’t like them or anything, I just hadn’t reached the point where I’d thought about having them yet! Like Nia said, I am a big kid, should I really be considering becoming a parent yet, when I can barely look after myself as it is?! “I, we, you… we’re not ready!” I blurted out but Nia only laughed. “What?! Why the fuck are you laughing, I’m serious!”
“I know you are, and that’s why I’m laughing. It’s funny and adorable in equal measure,” She told me, continuing to laugh at me as she sat up straight and crossed her legs underneath her. “But I think we are. I’ve seen you with Jay, with Loki. Even with Elysia, though we don’t see her that often; you’re great with kids Jase, and I think you’ll make a fantastic father. I’ve been ready for a while, but I wanted us to be in a position where we could actually make it work… I think we’re at that point now.”
“Then why the hell didn’t you tell me any of this, give me chance to work up to the idea?!” I asked, starting to panic.
“Jesus babe, it’s not like I’m pregnant already, is it?!” She said, shaking her head as she chuckled at me. “I’m just saying that maybe it’s time I consider coming off of birth control… doesn’t mean we have to go into active baby making mode yet, but when the mood strikes us, we see what happens. Is this really all that shocking for you? You’re acting like I suggested we rob a bank or something…”
“Robbing a bank seems like an easier suggestion right now, it really does,” I said without really thinking. Bigmouth strikes again. “You really… you think we’re ready?”
She nodded her head. “I do. Have for a while. I’ve been ready since before you came out of retirement, but I wanted to make sure you were… your reaction is kind of making me wonder if I judged it wrong though, I won’t lie…”
I almost told her she had, just blurting it out… but I stopped myself and thought about it. Was she wrong? We had been married for years, we had good income, a stable home, lived in a good area. Two good areas, when you thought about it, though I guess if we were gonna start a family, we’d need to pick one city or the other eventually, but that was a future problem to deal with when it came along. Other than my overreaction through shock… why shouldn’t we consider it? “I mean… I’m not gonna say I don’t want kids, because you knowI do, but… you just caught me off guard, that’s all,” I told her, starting to relax a little. She obviously sensed the fact that I was getting comfortable again, because she started creeping towards me on all fours across the bed.
“And I think we can both agree that trying has its benefits too?” she said, as her hands rested on my thighs and she looked me right in the eyes. “It might need a lot of practice… all that sex, you might not want to go on the road… we both know I’m a bit of a handful already, so imagine what it’ll be like when I haven’t got the implant restricting my hormones…” she added as her hands moved further up my thighs.
A smirk slowly started to spread across my face, she didn’t really need to give me much encouragement in that department. “I think you may have me coming around to your way of thinking,” I told her with a smirk as her hand went to my belt buckle.
“Convenient turn of phrase babe,” she told me, as she slid my belt out of the buckle. And okay, so despite the fact that she was gonna need to get her implant removed before it would even be possible, and god knows how long it would take, we’d not seen each other for a few days and in the moment, it wasn’t about trying for a baby, it was just about being in the moment. But showering afterwards, I got to thinking about the idea… and the more I thought about it, the more I realised it wasn’t all that crazy after all. We were married, we loved one another, and sure, maybe our life wasn’t exactly conventional… but it’s two thousand and twenty, not nineteen twenty! People need to stop being so suburban and accept that the world is moved by different strokes these days, it isn’t just one formula for everyone. It was a big step… but Nia was probably right, it was probably the right step for us in the place we were at now. And despite everything, despite every aspect of our life together, I loved my wife more now than ever before. There wasn’t even an ounce of doubt in my mind as far as our marriage was concerned, so maybe it was time to take the next step. And we’d get to enjoy ourselves plenty in the process, so it’s win-win, right? I think so anyway...
